According to Donald Trump, perhaps poised to win his first presidential primary on Tuesday, his greatest strengths are winning too much and making terrific deals. One of his less-appreciated talents is making excuses for behavior that has not traditionally been included in the campaign curriculum
— and for his failure to live up to his own lofty standards of triumph. For a man whose soul has never made the acquaintance of brevity or wit, these exercises render him unusually snappy. Explanations are unnecessary, as are apologies. Even if he improvised a moment that has left a wave of shaking heads rippling in its wake, he stands by what he said.
However, as Trump’s magnetic press appeal only grows stronger when he says something unthinkable, he has to think ofsomething to follow it up with. Which is when the grab bag of excuses below comes in handy.
If Trump keeps doing well in the primary, these excuses could one day becomepresidential excuses. Pull out a notebook and learn from the master.*
*Warning: These excuses have not been approved by the FDA for any human being besides Donald Trump. If you try to use these on your friends, family, and colleagues, they may cause your entire life to implode. These sentences are completely insufficient for use by anyone who is not Donald Trump, and will cause everyone in your life to question your capacity for empathy and ability to act with a modicum of decorum in social settings. Deploy them at your own peril.
Source: mtv
No comments:
Post a Comment